My handsome boys,
Last night you wore collared shirts to a beautiful backyard wedding. You looked so grown up. A lot of the extended family was there. They were so excited to meet you. Lots of hugs and laughter. And plenty of other babies to meet. Your dad is working really long days lately. He wakes up to leave for the day when you're awake for your middle of the night feeding. The past two nights I've been just getting you back to bed when he is heading out the door. It's nice to get to pray with him before he goes, though. I love your dad so much. He works so hard for us. He comes home around dinner time and always can't wait to see you. He was spoiled last week when he didn't have a job and got to spend all day with you. You're the first people he wants to see when he walks through the door. Last night after the wedding, we had a few errands to run. You boys slept in the car with dad. He was exhausted, and you were up past your bedtime. When we got home from our chaotic evening, I went to the kitchen to pack your dad's lunch for work the next day and he took you upstairs to get you into jammies and tucked into bed. He fell asleep before I came upstairs, but he left the light on for me.
When I woke up to feed you before I went to bed, you didn't even open your eyes. You were both so tired. Just like dad. And when I burped you, your hair smelled like your dad's cologne. So I knew he had cuddled you in his arms for a while before putting you down. He lives for that time with you. And I couldn't put you down. I am so in love with you boys. Once you were snuggled up together in your crib for the night, I sat on the bed in the quiet lamplight and listened to the deep breaths and occasional sigh from the three loves of my life.
I've caught myself worrying lately that your little lives have been too jam packed full of busy. That we don't have enough peace. That the peace should be the constant instead of the chaos. Life's funny like that sometimes. But what I forget is that all that busy makes the peace more peaceful.
I don't think our lives are going to slow down anytime soon, but I'm so grateful for the quiet that happens every once in a while. And a life without busy sure is boring.
I still can't believe I get to be your mom. That you are mine. What a sweet thing to realize over and over again.
I love you,